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I Heart Ice Cream

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QUICK HITS
rafe and caleb are not good at FPS. twitter ruins everything. thanks for destroying MFA security and API, twitter! caleb eats a cronut! there are spoilers for the movie green room (a little bit). mother’s day is COMING UP QUICKLY. life protip: if you haven’t texted someone in a long time, introduce yourself. don’t just say “it’s been a long time!” CALEB’S HEART IS FINE IT’S FINE.

HIGH LOWS
rafe’s high-low
high: company org changes
low: forgot rent

caleb’s high-low
high: ice cream
low: swing dance

HOT HOT TOPICS
– how much joy is appropriate to show at work when you have the next day off?
– any dish served with sauce should come with enough bread or rice to soak up said sauce
– do you store your hot sauce in the fridge or no?
– how much do wisdom teeth suck? asking from a dentist’s office.
– what is the smoothest way you’ve ever been able to tell someone to shut up.
– biggest unexpected expense.
– is it a requirement that every gym has an old man with no shame who walks around the locker room naked?
– are hot dogs just sandwiches?
– don’t fuck with me if I haven’t eaten that day

JOHN CANDY
MOVIE – delirious (1991) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102598)
caleb 8/10
rafe 7.75/10
SONGS – delirious songs
david bowie – I’m deranged (lost highway)

NEXT MOVIE – once upon a crime (1992) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101625)
NEXT SONGS – fairy tale

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Allergic to People

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QUICK HITS
caleb made cake, had a party, and fixed some broken shit! rafe is stressed about covid! one of caleb’s cats tries to get involved in the conversation, and why not? also poptarts! and how does minimum wage from 1991 translate to today’s money?

HIGH LOWS
rafe’s high-low
high: the demon
low: work meeting

caleb’s high-low
high: game night
low: scientist allergies

HOT HOT TOPICS
– what is one thing in the past you know someone born long after you doesn’t understand that you wish was around/still a thing today?
– is the rain-soaked, neon-lit roof of a parking garage better than a low cliff misted with salt spray at dawn for a fateful confrontation?
– tummy touches and crotch bumps should be a more common way to greet someone you know.
– smiley fries are better than dino nuggies. that’s my hot take
– pickles have no right to be as good as they are. you can choose sweet or spicy and they are also low in calories.
– one can never have too many memes.

JOHN CANDY
MOVIE – career opportunities (1991) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101545)
caleb 6.5/10
rafe 7/10
SONGS – minimum wage job
they might be giants – minimum wage

NEXT MOVIE – only the lonely (1991) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102598)
NEXT SONGS – lonely songs

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Nothing But Trouble Sucks

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QUICK HITS
rafe is concerned about all the sluts in heaven. caleb is having his own ups and downs. but also tapotio doritos, and barry, and the witch! also the supreme court is NOW supposed to rule on blocking mifepristone on friday (today 4/21/2023). fingers crossed they listen to the FDA and don’t block the use of a medication that’s been used for decades and is very safe.

some good things, like watching the national geographic video on a gulper eel:
https://youtu.be/u7QXdlSBGGY

HIGH LOWS
rafe’s high-low
high: new monitors
low: nail biting

caleb’s high-low
high: tapotio doritos
low: anxiety depression

HOT HOT TOPICS
– the worst kind of person, is someone who doesn’t sweep the debris off their trailer before getting on the highway.
– have we covered the cube rule of food https://cuberule.com
– appetizers at restaurants should come in a way that can be split reasonably between two people.
five cheese sticks? seven tenders? what is wrong with these people?
– I ain’t got nothing. weather’s been nice and i live by the beach. um… best type of bathing suit for chilling out and swimming?
– cocaine bear – great or greatest movie ever? (now streaming on peacock)
– are pizza rolls calzones or ravioli?
– spelling errors on food menus usually indicate good food, at hole in the wall places anyway.
– what’s the better option of these 2 for a cis male to wear on a first date, thigh-highs or fishnets?
– based in your own personal enjoyment, what would be the best fictional city to visit
– how long should one spend attempting to learn a new topic? should one quit for the day after finally learning something new? or should you keep pushing forward with the learning until you are mentally damaged?

JOHN CANDY
MOVIE – nothing but trouble (1991) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102558)
caleb 1.5/10
rafe 2.1/10
SONGS – rafe is trouble caleb is nothing
natalie imbruglia – troubled by the way we came together (go soundtrack)

NEXT MOVIE – career opportunities (1991) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101545)
NEXT SONGS – minimum wage job

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A Series of Upnotes

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QUICK HITS
caleb and rafe both talk about health as aging millennials. caleb also talks about delicious food. and cereal, what even is the point if you can’t have good cereal? rafe does a word of the week, there’s concern about toxic waste from ohio (not talking about the government figures this time eyo), and somehow they still end up having a pretty okay time. and rafe learns one of her favorite 80’s bands is from australia!

HIGH LOWS
rafe’s high-low
high: taxes done
low: taxes NOT done?

caleb’s high-low
high: DC day
low: health

HOT HOT TOPICS
– why are all these dishes in the sink?
– what the fuck is wrong with people? (context- our system is down, but they NEED to know if a payment went through. So when told, hey maybe call the bank since they keep record of that shit, they INSIST on not doing so) SIGH
– some breakfast cereals for kids are worse than candy with the amount of sugar they have.
– why do I cheer so hard when I see stone cold steve austin in a ref shirt with cut off sleeves?
– what deranged logic drives a grocery to put the cream cheese next to the eggs without any signposting?
– apparently fruit loops cereal straws are a thing. what food would you be happy to have as a flavor in straw form (to use with whatever beverage you like)?
– why does it feel so good when you order regular fries and get a single onion ring or a random curly fry in the container?
– what is the ideal milkfat for drinking white milk?
– the sketchers stay on during sex.
– choose one—Ice cream headache or paper cut
– do crocs belong in sport mode during sex?

JOHN CANDY
MOVIE – rescuers down under (1990) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0100477)
caleb 7.8/10
rafe 7.5/10
SONGS – australian bands
icehouse – we can get together

NEXT MOVIE – nothing but trouble (1991) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102558)
NEXT SONGS – rafe is trouble caleb is nothing

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