Tag Archive for swagmonstaflexx

This is an Opportunity

QUICK HITS
top final actor vote!! voting ends july 5, 2023 at 5pm eastern. https://www.rankedchoices.com/cm9d

caleb had a tough week, rafe was too hot, and read upsetting news, but there was still fun to be had.
here’s what rafe read in the news: https://grist.org/accountability/gas-stations-underground-storage-tank-leaks-environmental-disaster

HIGH LOWS
rafe’s high-low
high: heating up
low: VPN blocks

caleb’s high-low
high: braves baseball
low: back problems

HOT HOT TOPICS
– in honor of july 4th: this will be someone’s last weekend with all ten fingers.
– the 3 things you absolutely wouldn’t do in any job interview.
– when a holiday falls on a tuesday or a thursday, a four day weekend should occur. going to work for one day in the middle of a holiday weekend seems rather unproductive.
– how excited should I be to find out a snoball (a.k.a. shaved ice) place is opening a block from me? ’cause I feel a 7 or 8 is reasonable.
– is reddit going to die? or is this temporary
– why does a sandwich taste better when cut diagonally versus being cut either vertically or horizontally?
– the most underrated fast food item, that currently exists on a menu. (also the most overrated item)
– what is one luxury you could live without but would be extremely difficult to give up.

JOHN CANDY
MOVIE – wagons east (1994) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0111653)
caleb 5.25/10
rafe 6/10
SONGS – cardinal directions
NOFX – east bay

NEXT MOVIE – canadian bacon (1995) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0109370)
NEXT SONGS – breakfast

2022 Year End Review

QUICK HITS
this episode has everything. holiday concert reviews, hip problems, coffee and water obsessions, and the movies you should definitely watch for the season: guardians of the galaxy christmas specia, muppet christmas carol (with extra song), and home alone.

HIGH LOWS
rafe’s high-low
high: SWAGMASS #teamRIB
low: the weekend

rafe’s 2022 high-low
high: twitch streamer
low: covid

caleb’s high-low
high: muppet christmas carol
low: hip

caleb’s 2022 high-low
high: strong marriage
low: father passing away

HOT HOT TOPICS
– the classic xmas movies – are they really that classic or is nostalgia just super heavy this time of year?
– as crappy as things can be, we aren’t completely boned.
– nah, we’re completely boned.
– I wish to see our government grow a few braincells and realize that a life insureance policy that is focused on making sure your family can put you in the ground without having to beg on social media is not a money gaining scheme and stop screwing over folks who require gov aid to live.
– in the long line of “good ideas” where do you put “coming to the ugly christmas sweater themed christmas party in a skimpy dress and loudly complaining that the person you want to sexually harass isn’t there”?
– how do you survive being one of like three sober people at a company christmas party?
– “elf” is getting worse and worse on how it holds up. back in the day as a kid it was the bomb. but it’s started becoming cringe more and more as the years go by.
– how is it somehow everyone elses fault but yours when youmake the choice to NOT read the packet of info detailing the $40 monthly payment you just signed up for and suddenly you realize that there are problems with it?
– 2022 was a year full of really shitty things that happened. it also was the year in which I experienced some of the best moments of my entire life. formal request for 2023, more of the latter, less of the former. pretty please and thank you.
– if you can’t beat them, why would you join them? that just sounds like bad philosophy. imagine if hitler won ww2.

JOHN CANDY
MOVIE SPECIAL FOR CHRISTMAS!!!
MOVE – home alone (1990) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099785)
caleb 9/10
rafe 9/10
SONGS – rafe is alone; caleb is home
neutral milk hotel – gardenhead / leave me alone
even mentions snow!

NEXT MOVIE – the canadian conspiracy (1985) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0285470)
NEXT SONGS – canadian artists
next ep, 2022 favorite song!

Hashtag Chunky Bomb

QUICK HITS
caleb and rafe met at a cougar bar in glen burnie. let’s get angy about auxillary ports and bluetooth. caleb has a fun weekend and also a not-fun work day. he asks the important questions, like slimy, chewy, or chunky? PLEASE HELP US GET #CHUNKYBOMB TRENDING! rafe reads off some foreign language sayings that are cooler than english. and she’s super concerned about dna modification being pushed as non-GMO? https://www.technologyreview.com/2017/12/19/146805/these-are-not-your-fathers-gmos/

HIGH LOWS
rafe’s high-low
high: yu yu hakusho
low: weight gain

caleb’s high-low
high: frederick festivities
low: going into work

HOT HOT TOPICS
– if we could trust everyone to be good people, we wouldn’t need security jobs. (police, cyber security, mall cops, &c)
– why does this one person at work keep posting dumb boomer memes in our department’s slack channel?
– who are people more likely to follow in the work place, subject matter experts or someone who has a way with words?
– I’ve been feeling like a run over sponge for a few weeks now, how do I stop being so exhausted all the time
– kesha or ke$ha?
– is it the heat, or the humidity?
– florida: no, or HELL no?
– humid or dry.
– len the plumber fucked with the wrong family when he tries to scam my mother for 8 thousand dollars. no question or comments needed, just a statement of fact
– last night I was once again reminded that, despite all the bullshit in my life, I have one thing so amazing that it makes me the luckiest girl in the world because I have it. what is one thing you have that makes you feel lucky?
– how fucking cool is this poster:
– we’ve already got highs and lows for the podcast. what is your medium for this week?
– do you believe in ghosts?
– what’s the best way to beg someone above you to please do their job so you can do yours? assume boss above them considers them blameless golden children and you the scapegoat for the work never getting done regardless of any reality presented.
– when trying to hang out with someone who has a busy personal life, what’s the best tactic you can think of to make them drop everything and focus on what’s really important ie “my total lack of any friends or personal life”? and why is it “loudly complaining about other people having personal lives and obligations”?
– what are your feelings on ultimate ownership? And holding yourself accountable for the actions of others?

CHRIS FARLEY
NEXT MOVIE – tommy boy (1995) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0114694)
caleb 8/10
rafe 8.75/10
NEXT SONGS – sales
reel big fish – sellout

NEXT MOVIE – black sheep (1996) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0115697)
NEXT SONGS – rafe is black, caleb is sheep

Best Booty Call (feat. Dani)

QUICK HITS
we are pleased as always to have dani on the podcast! we get to talk about how much distain she has for a certain hot-hot-topic saga, rafe is doing the lost ark thing, maybe being a witch will happen later, and they try to remember a time before cell phones. also please call this number to get adorable pep talks by children: 707-998-8410. “fuck that person.” also rafe gushes a big about swagmonstaflexx and you should go follow him and daddylarp on twitch!!!

HIGH LOWS/SMILES AND CRIES
rafe’s high-low
high: boy drama no longer drama
low: school

dani’s high-low
high: her person! jinjer charity!
low: tiktok bullying

HOT HOT TOPICS
– what’s the best way to communicate to management about your desire to take on more responsibilities and give administrative input and why is it “declare 3 days in advance that you’re going to call in sick on a category 5 catastrofuck day because you were asked to do something in advance”
– what’s the best way to convince someone that a stressful training experience is best for new hires and why is it “I was trained in that stressful environment and I handled it just fine, also don’t put me there now because I can’t handle it and other people need to handle it and don’t ask me to handle it.”
– best pie to cook in a smoker or grill
– are the people who design bathroom stalls all voyeurs, or are they just happy to see us?
– did donald trump give watersports kinksters a bad name?
– what’s the best tree in north america and why?
– would you eat a shrimp po boy from a fast food place? what if that place is krystal burger?
– what’s the best opening line to use when texting someone for a booty call?
– what’s the smallest amount of power that you have seen go to someone’s head
– how oppressive is it to not have 10 other people change over to your way of doing things despite loudly grumblewhining about it?
– why do responsibilities always seem to entail being responsible for things?
– daylight time or standard time, when we eventually decide to stop changing our clocks twice a year?
– should I feel bad cuz I suck at chess but I defeat my son every time?
– fuck the haters. waffle house is good.

DENZEL WASHINGTON
MOVIE – the magnificent seven (2016) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt2404435)
rafe 4.2/10
dani 4.75/10
SONGS – seven

NEXT MOVIE – fences (2016) (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt2671706)
NEXT SONGS – 1950’s